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The Seasons of our Lives -Wise Woman, Maiden, Mother, Crone

As I ponder this chapter, I have a clear picture of how I see the Maiden, Mother, and Crone. I see a beautiful grid and how it all works so seamlessly together! Like the Flower of Life symbol. I suppose that's what it is, really. This is my perspective and my story. I hope I can give it life for you.

This life we live has many different levels of balance. In the last book, Divine Feminine Awakening, we found the balance between Divine feminine, Divine masculine, wounded feminine, and wounded masculine. Despite what our biological sex is, we all carry each of these parts in our unique measure. Depending on where we are on our journey, we are each dealing with these parts and what they have to teach us. Finding balance in all the different areas of our lives, spiritual versus physical, masculine versus feminine, schedules versus Divine timing, can all be quite the balancing act. 

Then there are the different seasons we go through. As we go along this journey, we go through different seasons of our life. There are obvious seasons that most of us experience quarterly, depending on where we reside on this big blue ball. Where I live in the northeastern quadrant of the United States, we see the clear definition of each season- spring, summer, autumn, and winter, for the most part. That's what I would like to discuss here. How the seasons relate to the different stages of our femininity and my theory on how it all works.

Despite what our linear calendar might say, there are times we find ourselves in a personal spring, summer, autumn or winter. This holds true in the Maiden | Mother | Crone archetypes as well.

Relating the seasons of our lives to natures seasons. 

Comparing the Maiden archetype to 'spring into summer'. The Maiden being virginal, beginning her new life. A new venture in life, regardless of her age. A new season, a fresh start, planting seeds, or a new adventure, despite what her biological clock says.

Comparing the Mother archetype to 'summer into fall'. Creating, growing, and harvesting. This includes a large part of her adult live as she sows, nurtures, loves, and feeds her crops. And then harvesting all she has worked so hard for and sacrificed to create. Whether it be a family, a business, or a craft, being a mother doesn't necessarily mean giving birth literally, but caring for loved ones, beloved pets, a passion turned into a business, elderly parents, or even a special needs child. This contains a large portion of her life and focus, and when this season begins to come to a close, she may start to feel lost. Who she is, who she was, or who she thinks she is supposed to be.

Comparing the Crone archetype to 'fall into winter’. As she comes to a place in life full of wisdom and accomplishment, successes passed, and a time to teach, share and rest. This is the stage I am entering biologically, yet at the same time, I enter a Maiden stage as I venture into new ideas and creations. 

As each year has seasons, each life has seasons, and I believe each season and situation has seasons as well. For clarification, I would consider "winter into spring" the stage including death, birth, and early childhood, before the Maiden stage. The transition between death and birth. 

Considering the parts within the Maiden stage, which is brand new like ‘spring into summer’, the Mother stage like ‘summer into fall’, which is nurturing and development, and the Crone stage like ‘fall into winter’, as she has gained wisdom through this life experience. All WITHIN the Maiden stage. And the same within the other two stages. 

Maturing from the Maiden into the Mother like ‘spring into summer’, which for the Mother, is a Maiden voyage into a new stage of Life. Mothering this season as it grows, develops, and becomes a harvest like ‘summer into fall’. And then into the Crone like ‘fall into winter’, having the wisdom to know what to do with that harvest. How to prepare, preserve and dispense it to those we care for.

Then entering the Crone stage as a brand-new adventure and season of Life. Once again, taking that Maiden voyage into the unknown. Finding ourselves in the position to have time to ourselves (now caring for ourselves as we did our "children" in the Mother stage). Time to start something new and attend to our own needs as our 'children' are grown. A time for self-care, with no constraints, unless put on by ourselves.

As I come into this Crone season of my life, I find myself on a Maiden voyage, creating something new. Learning and growing into a whole new being. Becoming, with minimal boundaries, the person I have been morphing into my whole life. Looking back, I can see how Father|Mother|God has been preening me into this being that is now able to share and teach what I have learned, and so much more is shifting and evolving, opening so many doorways even as I write this. 

We have been taught in our society that life is linear. We have been handed a linear calendar and taught our whole lives how to work Monday through Friday, and after chores are done, we can enjoy life on Saturday and Sunday, after church, of course. As we struggle through this linear life we can feel so twisted and torn as we battle to fit a square peg into a round hole. Many of us feel forced to live this life that 'someone' made the rules for. What we are supposed to do and what feels right are generally two very different things! From an early age, we are taught to suck it up and do what we are 'supposed' to do to follow the rules. We are supposed to follow this linear path of going to school, then college, finding a career, getting married, buying a house, having babies, eventually retiring, and then playing golf or quilting. But who made up these rules? 

Coming to a place in my life of leaning into what feels right over "doing the right thing", I find myself in a new cycle. A cycle of listening to my Higher self and my intuition. Trusting that how I'm feeling is the right way to feel for my personal cycle. Many of us have spent our lives being pressured to act a certain way so as not to "upset the apple cart." "Don't make waves!", "Be a good girl" or whatever other cliche comes to mind for you. 

Entering my personal Crone stage, as this may be part of getting older, I care less what other people think and care more about what I think. I'm learning to listen to my body, spirit, and heart to learn what is right for my journey, above all else. Learning to trust myself has been a larger part of my journey. Having made so many bad decisions through my Maiden and Mother stages, I questioned my every decision. After all those bad choices and mistakes, how could I be trusted to make a right decision? 

Or were these bad decisions at all? We are told that we have made a bad decision by our parents, friends, society or "the rules." But what if they weren't bad decisions at all? What if they were the right decision for us at that time in our cycle? To give us the lessons we were meant to learn? We aren't here on a picnic, are we? We are here for lessons- Soul lessons. The tough stuff!

Through my journey of understanding the bigger picture, I have come to understand that this planet we call home is a place of learning. A school, if you will, where our Higher selves make the difficult decision to come and learn the hard stuff. Earth is a place that was created by this Universe where we come, knowing we will forget and have to figure it out as we go. We chose to come here. We chose our Soul lessons and teachers before we came. Our parents, friends, and all sorts of other teachers have agreed to come and help us along this journey. Help us to learn these lessons we agreed to learn. 

So who says what's right or wrong? Who decides that we should be or act a certain way? Humans. Humans that don't understand the whole big picture. Humans who are on their own journey. Pulling back and seeing this picture from afar will help us to have compassion for those who have made these rules and all their human flaws. Understanding that they are also on their own journey, learning lessons, and making their own mistakes! Circling back to our 'bad decisions,' are they really bad decisions at all? Or are they lessons we came here to learn? 

On this journey or in this book of Life, as I like to say, there are many characters we meet along the way. There's a whole story, including chapters, pages, paragraphs and sentences, plots and twists in this story. How boring would this story be if there weren't plots and twists? Good guys and bad guys, Villains and Heroes and all sorts in between. Some are a little of each, depending on their own personal journey. Maybe a villain who didn't necessarily mean any harm and was able to redeem himself and become your hero? 

There are the everyday mundane characters. Pets who teach us how to love and lose love, and friends who were only here for a chapter. This journey has so many moving parts, things to keep or attempt to keep in balance, lessons to learn, big and small, the seasons are always changing. This is why going through this journey, expecting Life to be perfect, is pointless.

There are those of us who would prefer a mundane, boring life, which is ok. This may not be the time yet for their hard lessons. Maybe they're taking a vacation here on Earth until the next Life. For the most part, I would imagine they are choosing not to engage, just floating through this life wondering why the same 'bad' things keep happening to them. Wondering why they're on a rinse-and-repeat cycle. Because they are choosing not to engage, they are not growing and learning. And that's their prerogative, I suppose. 

I spent almost half a century in my Maiden and Mother seasons wondering why I couldn't just be happy. Why do I keep reliving the same mistakes? Each chapter felt like the same story with different scenery and different characters. When I entered my Crone season, I realized the change had to come from within, and it was important for me to love myself, flaws and all. This is when things shifted for me. Through this change, I was able to change my story, or matrix, as I like to say. 

What we see around us is what we, as creative beings, have created. If you don't like what you see, change it. Not necessarily by running away, but by going within and figuring out what you don't like or love. Go within and figure out how to love yourself, and allow love to come to you. That's what it's all about, really. Love. Big Love. Divine Love. 

That's what Yeshua (Jesus) came to teach us. The Way to Love. True Unconditional Love. Loving even those parts, we don't like very much and finding compassion for ourselves and those who have hurt us. Loving our neighbor as ourselves. But how can we do that if we do not Love ourselves? Understanding the bigger picture and finding forgiveness and compassion for ourselves is the key to finding the same for our villains. This does not mean allowing them to hurt us, it simply means understanding their journey is different from ours. Taking a different path and setting boundaries to not allow them to hurt us any longer. Forgiving someone and having compassion for them does not mean tolerating their bad behavior and treating us less than we deserve. 

This is what I have learned through my cycles and the Wisdom I have come to recognize in my Crone season. Circling back to our main point of these cycles, I ponder this vision of a chart in my head; I hope to be able to bring it to life for you. I see it so clearly, this perfectly interwoven web of cycles. A grid, if you will. As we go through each stage, we will go through the stages within each season. As a Maiden, we will step into something new. We will learn, create and share. We will become the teacher of the Mother and the Crone. As a Mother, we will step into something new. We will learn, create and share. We will become the teacher of the Maiden and the Crone. As a Crone, we will step into something new. We will learn, create and share. We will become the teacher of the Maiden and the Mother.

•Maiden- something new

•Mother- creating and growing

•Crone- sharing and resting

Within each season, there is a beginning, middle, and end. And then moving on to the next season- another beginning, middle, and end.

•Maiden- beginning

•Mother- middle

•Crone- end

As mentioned earlier, Life is not linear. It is cycles within cycles within larger seasons. I consider myself a Maiden Crone currently. With young adult children who do not need me anymore and a new career developing, a career designed to share and teach what I have learned on my journey as a Maiden and Mother. Finally to a stage in life where I am able to take what I have learned and teach others. I have gained many tools over my journey that have helped me through, and it's now time to share those tools, as the archetypal role of the Crone.

With my Heart Activation Program, I have brought together all of the tools and techniques that helped me along my healing journey. A journey that includes verbal abuse and c-ptsd (complex post-traumatic stress disorder) from living with an undiagnosed sociopathic narcissist for the majority of my Life. I realize this is an all too common term these days, so please understand I'm not using it lightly. Nor am I a doctor; however, this is what I have learned through my journey of healing and understanding what caused my damage. 

I continue the fight to bring awareness to Verbal abuse, what it is, and red flags to look for. I have been able to help young women (Maidens) to change paths and create healthy, loving relationships. And I have helped many mature women (Crones) like me to gain self-worth, create awareness, educate, and begin to heal from verbal abuse. I teach tools and techniques to fill your tool chest for self-healing. 

I am a Self Love coach, and though I am a "Healer" and a "Light-Worker," I do not heal you; I teach you to heal yourself like a Mother teaching her children the skills to live their own Life. And I give you the tools you need to do so if you choose. Through metaphysical techniques such as Crystals, Reiki, and Tarot, and proper self-care, including physical, spiritual, and mental wellness, I was able to find true unconditional self-love. And the beautiful side effect of unconditional self-love is I was able to attract the true unconditional love of a partner. And as mentioned previously, Love is what the journey, this school, is all about.

If this resonates with you, please email me at the email listed below. Or find me on my Facebook group Heart Mender Toolbox or my private Facebook group Mending Heart with Self Love.

Thank you for letting me share my story with you. Know that I am not perfect. I am still growing and learning, and I intend to continue always. This is a journey. And I will spend it learning and sharing. A Maiden forever!

Love and Light,

Tami Jean

Self Love Coach

Best Selling Author

Mom and someday Grandmother

Professional Nail Technician

Verbal Abuse Survivor

(Not necessarily in that order :D)

Click HERE to purchase full book full of many other amazing personal stories!


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